It can be difficult to fully realize that your marriage is over. When divorce is the only way forward for you, it can make you confront a lot of important truths about your family and your future, especially when there are kids involved. Ultimately, you must do what is right for your kids as well as yourself. Divorce can shift the family dynamic quickly, and you need to address it. A St. Charles, MO, divorce lawyer can help you make those changes.
Is Divorce the Right Option for You?
When you and your partner start seriously discussing divorce, you must consider all your options. Figuring out the right choice for you and your kids can be a difficult and emotionally draining conversation to have, but it’s a necessary one. Divorce is a different situation for everyone who goes through it. There are also couples all over the world who endure marital strife and don’t get divorced. You must ask yourself what’s right for your kids.
Growing up in a broken home could foster feelings of resentment toward you and your spouse. There’s a chance that your bond won’t recover once it’s broken, and you’ll just be staying in an unpleasant situation so your kids don’t live in a divorced household. Choosing to stay together just to keep the family unit from breaking could be a terrible decision that pushes your children away. It can make them feel anger, betrayal, and even guilt toward both of their parents.
Sometimes, breaking the family unit needs to be done to preserve what’s left of it. You and your spouse can work together to create a mutually beneficial child custody agreement and a parenting plan you can both work with. The last thing you want is for your kids to grow up with a skewed view on relationships because their parents refused to get divorced when it was clearly the right thing to do. Your kids should never have to bear the pain of your marital strife.
Staying Together Can Be Risky
When two parents realize their marriage is over, they may make a conscious decision to end the marriage and develop a decent co-parenting situation. Often, their kids are better off, especially when compared to the alternative. Having two parents who are free from a bad relationship and able to make better, stronger decisions can foster a much healthier home environment. It is ultimately your choice, but here are some of the risks that staying together could invite:
- Parental Alienation: When a marriage is in jeopardy and both spouses realize things are heading toward divorce, it’s not uncommon for one spouse to try poisoning the kids against the other. One parent may desire to become the favorite parent, and they may use gifts, lies, and even threats to turn their kid against the other parent. If parental alienation is discovered during the divorce process, it can hurt the alienating parent’s case.
- Toxic Models: When you choose to ignore the problems in your relationship and stay together for the sake of your kids, you are showing them what a toxic relationship model looks like. They may grow up thinking that certain behavior is okay in a relationship, and they might bring toxicity into their own relationships. This can hurt your relationship with your child, who may resent you for giving them undue pain.
FAQs
Q: Can Infidelity Affect a Missouri Divorce?
A: Yes, infidelity can affect a Missouri divorce. Even though Missouri is a no-fault divorce state, proof of infidelity can impact the court’s decision on how to divide assets, how to award child custody, and whether alimony is given. If the cheating spouse used marital assets, such as a joint account, to fund dates with their affair partner, that can seriously impact the settlement.
Q: Do Most Divorces Go to Trial in Missouri?
A: No, most divorces in Missouri do not go to trial. Usually, divorces are settled out of court through negotiations. Couples may decide to use a mediator or work on a collaborative divorce together. Many uncontested divorces are not settled in a courtroom because both partners can work together on an amicable solution. Contested divorces must be decided by the courts if both partners are totally uncooperative.
Q: What Is a Contested Divorce?
A: A contested divorce is the worst-case scenario for your case. In a contested divorce, neither partner is willing to compromise on the details, and both partners are seeking to get as much as they can out of the other partner. Contested divorces are often long, drawn-out, complicated, emotional, and personal. You should always get a divorce lawyer for a contested divorce. Your former partner has likely hired their own legal representative, and you will need to do likewise to avoid a harmful divorce decree.
Q: How Is Child Custody Decided in Missouri?
A: In Missouri, child custody is decided by determining the right thing to do for the child. The court will always prioritize the child’s welfare over everything else in the divorce, including the wishes of the parents. If one parent wishes to get sole custody, but their living environment isn’t stable, the court may be reluctant to grant that parent their wish. The judge considers both parents’ financial situations, criminal history, ongoing health, and their relationship with the child.
Reach Out to an Experienced Divorce Lawyer Today
Deciding to end your marriage is a big deal, and it’s going to have significant ramifications throughout your entire life. It can be even harder to decide when you have kids. There are pros and cons for both sides of the argument, but it is ultimately up to you to choose the right thing to do for your kids. An experienced divorce lawyer can help you reach that decision.
The legal team at Stange Law Firm knows the most effective ways to work on a parenting plan, among other tasks in a divorce. Contact us to speak to a valued team member about scheduling a consultation.
